I'm okay,, totally!!

hey world, how's it going without me?
hahahaha..

last week I tried to do net-fasting,,
just stayed so so away from facebook, twitter, YM and MSN .
and I just made it until 4 days,,
not because I can't resist,, NO!
just because I was finished with myself, finish with my "other-side" .
I have successfully got over everything,,

once I thought I lost the path (yes, that path) .
but then again,
I wouldn't lose anything I've never even had .
so here I come to the conclusion that I didn't really lost anything .

and now I just to choose,,
to keep this "another sad ending story" on my mind or just let it go and be happy?
I chose to be happy .
life's all about choice, am I right?

if I'm writing here right now, means that I'm choosing to see my blog than going online (which I'm about doing a sec later)..
and about going online,,
I know you just don't wanna see me,
or you just don't want to hurt me,
or yeah, if you just don't care (whatever..),
I won't disturb you anymore .
like Edward said : "as if I'd never existed" .

I actually wanna say "thankyou" for giving me those great memories, those silly but sweet moments.
and I also wanna say "sorry" because all the mistakes . just forget that, if that's not too much .

moreover,,
I'm so proud of myself now,
I'm happy to be me,
it's just so much better than I thought it could be .
I'm happier now,, getting over you is not as hard as I thought .

see ya,,

solitude

me and my solitary life kyanya emang jodoh banget .
hha .
post geje kali ini cuma buat menyambut hari - hari ke depan ajh .
hari hari yg kaya dulu lagi .
bangun , pergi sekolah , bosen , pulang , les , buka fesbuk sampe bosen , tidur .
terus kya gitu .
tanpa ada temen yang bisa selalu dicurhatin .
yang bisa bikin ketawa setiap saat .
yang ngasih "harapan" akan hal menyenangkan di satu hari itu .
hha hha .
konyol emang .
aneh .
emang nature-nya kali ya . toh udah biasa juga kan sendirian ? kesepian ?
mungkin bakalan aneh untuk awal - awalnya . tapi nanti juga biasa lagi .
kan dari dulu juga emang kya gitu . hha hha .

if you're not ready of losing, don't ever want to own anything .
coz nothing lasts forever .

jangan depends sama sesuatu . soalnya lo bakal sedih pas sesuatu itu hilang . terus lo mau ngapain pas sesuatu itu pindah dari tempatnya?
pernah mimpi punya dunia yang statis . semua hal tetap seperti sekarang . ga usah berubah - ubah . ga usah bikin bingung . ga usah bikin sebel . but we're not the owner of the world, rite?

i'm the best when i'm alone .

-cewek koleris yang arogan, simply : hopeless-

my current theme song . haha .

super geje nih .
haha .
cocok banget sama lagu Katy Perry .

HOT AND COLD

You change your mind

like a girl changes clothes

Yeah, you PMS

like a bitch I would know

And you always think,

always speak cryptically

I should know

that you're no good for me'

Cause you're hot and you're cold

You're yes and you're no

You're in and you're out

You're up and you're down

You're wrong when it's right

You're black and it's white

We fight, we break up

We kiss, we make up

You, you don't really wanna stay, no

But you, you don't really wanna go, oh'

Cause you're hot and you're cold

You're yes then you're no

You're in and you're out

You're up and you're down

We used to be just like twins, so in sync

The same energy now's a dead battery

Used to laugh 'bout nothing,

now you're plain boring

I should know that you're not gonna change'

Someone call the doctor

Got a case of a love disorder

Stuck on a roller coaster

Can't get off this ride

hahaha .
gila lagu ini cocok banget .
parah parah .
dasar ah .
pgn marah tapi ga enak .
ah aneh .

aku dan jalan setapak

kemarin aku jalan - jalan di tengah hutan,,
sendirian,,
tiba - tiba ada jalan setapak,,
berkilauan, menggoda,,
akhirnya aku ikutin jalan setapak itu,,

tapi ternyata bagian terburuk bukan pada apa yang ada di depan,,
tapi apa yang ada di dalam,,
aku ngga tau dimana ujung jalan setapak ini,,
di jurang atau di mulut beruang,,
atau malah ngga ada ujungnya sama sekali,,
aku marah - marah sendiri,,
soalnya jalan setapak ini ngasih harapan buat keluar dari hutan dengan happy ending,,
tapi juga bikin kesel karena gtw ujungnya ada di mana,,

akhirnya aku menduga - duga sendiri,,
soal jurang atau mulut beruang,,
sambil berusaha tenang,,
tapi diam - diam ternyata aku terus berharap nemuin batu terakhir,,
setiap beberapa meter sekali aku berhenti dan mikir ini adalah batu terakhir,,
tapi ternyata masih ada batu lain lagi,,
aku marah - marah sendiri,,

tapi ternyata,,
harusnya aku ngga kaya gitu,,
aku harusnya bersyukur,,
kemanapun jalan setapak ini mengarah,,
ke jurang atau mulut beruang,,
aku bersyukur nemuin jalan setapak indah ini,,
yang udah bikin perjalanan di hutan jadi lebih seru,,

makasih ya jalan setapak,,
kalau ini batu terakhir, aku rela dehh^^
kalau kamu masih panjang banget dan ngga mau ngasih tau tujuannya dimana , biarpun aku cape nantinya,,
gpapa deh,,
aku bakal seneng - seneng ajah,,

makasih ya jalan setapak,, :P

. starlight effect .

they laugh .
i smile .
they shout .
i whisper .
there's something .
and i'm tryin to ignore .
they know it . they want it .
i think i don't . but maybe i'm wrong .
it's not super-ordinary .
it's just like the right man in the right place .
i'm disturbed .
it is peculiar . really .
i'm fine .
as if i'm the happiest girl in the world . like he thinks .

the trophy is here!!

THANKS GOD!!
beberapa hari kemaren terasa sangat sangat menyenangkan sekaligus memancing emosi,,
dari mulai gempa di tengah2 debat, improvisasi yang bombastis, makhluk" tampan yang berkeliaran (wkaka), sampe hal" aneh yang menghibur juga menyedihkan,,
whatsoever,
the trophy is here..
we broke the curse,,
nothing's stronger than GOD!!

the so-called debater,,

i don't expect a big laughter,,
even a little smile is enough,,
you'd never know what's inside,,
even I can't see what's in there,,
I tend to be too melancholic,,
too drama-queen at once,,
if you say it's love, you must be wrong,,
if you say there's something wrong, you must be kidding me,,
yet, I'm okay but empty..

next destination : Bina Nusantara International E.Comp 2009.
Veni, Vidi, Vici..
Be strong!!